, 
, 
,
|
My kids want to stay with me now. We do have consent orders?
|
|
Posted 05 February, 2010, 04:50 PM
|
General Member
|
In 2004 my ex and self put together consent orders for the 4 kids. I got each second weekend and half the holidays. Both responsible for kids log term welfare. My kids now age 21, 18 16 & 14. The two age 21 & 18 are happy to stay with the mum and we catch up. The 16 and 14 year old now say they want to live with me. The mother will not allow this.
My question is what can I do
I want the 14 & 16 year old to stay with me! Can the mother call the police and come and take the kids back? I cant afford a lawyer. I want to do the right thing buy the kids and the mum is being a bully. Whats my best course of action?
|
|
|
 ,
|
| |
|
Posted 05 February, 2010, 07:26 PM
|
|
|
Hi thistime,
This question is actually answered in other forums I have read through on this site.It takes time to go through them all but well worth the effort.
From what I understand it is recognised by the police and courts that children of this age can't be made to stay somewhere they don't want to as they would just run away.
Your ex would have to initiate court action like a contravene of orders to have the matter heard , but if it is clear the children are refusing to return I dont think there is anything that the court can do , my 13yr old has refused to attend time with his father as agreed in interim orders (I did not encourage this or agree but I can't make him do it how would I? There is also a history of fear of physical punishment from the father etc) BUT the father who is represented by a solicitor has not taken it to court.
I would make sure the children have made a clear decision themselves and it is not just your wishes... but in saying that most kids those ages know there own mind!!
|
|
|
,
|
| |
|
Posted 06 February, 2010, 04:04 PM
|
Silver Member
|
Hey thistime,
To the extent of my knowledge beautifulDAY is correct in saying that at 14 & 16 years of age the opinions of the childeren are very relevant.
However I'm not terribly sure I agree with the process of simply not returning children due to their wishes as to me this is a two way street (what if previously to this time the mother just one day stopped contact for you with the children?). I would think that that a more appropriate and possibly less conflictual way would be to firstly try mediation and then after this if the mother is still refusing to consider the desires of the children, get some Court Orders in place. The children are old enough that if you explain this formailty to them and reason it needs to be this way (i.e. respect to their mother) they should understand.
Good Luck 
"Never, "for the sake of peace and quiet," deny your own experience or convictions". Dag Hammarskjold
I needed help with my case and couldn't afford a lawyer and found these guys invaluable srl-resources.org
|
|
|
,
|
| |
1 guests and 0 members are viewing this: None
Control functions:
, , ,
Forums
Rules
Groups
Unread
Recommend
Donate
